Finally

We had a good day.  Finally.

I can't express the battles we've had with Elyse lately.  She's a good kid, she really is, but if I had to sum her in two words they would be sensitive and dramatic.  Those two don't mix well together if you ask me.  She could stub a toe, lose a limb, misplace a toy, or be bumped into on the playground.  Her reactions are the same.  Crying, whining, and lots of it.  Since she was born she wakes from sleep screaming and crying hysterically.  For no reason.  One might think it's because she's overtired, that's one of the signs of a child not getting adequate rest, but I assure you, sleep is one thing she gets plenty of.  She cries because she wants to get up then cries because she wants to stay in bed, cries because you're in the room, cries because you leave, she just plain cries.  It.  Drives.  Me.  Bananas. 

I've tried different techniques but this past week I really cracked down on it with a zero tolerance approach and I also prayed.  I prayed for wisdom on how to handle her and the patience and perseverance to carry it out.  Probably something I should have done much sooner and I strive not to be harsh, but she needed to meet her match.  Not just her match, but the person placed in authority over her. 

We went head to head.  It took multiple battles over multiple days but I think she's cracked.  I hope she's cracked.  I pray she's cracked.  I'm seeking taming her spirit and not breaking it.  I feel like I hear that all of the time with kids like her and I get what they're saying, but I don't get how you know the difference, taming vs. breaking, and if you're doing it correctly. 

Today was wonderful.  Not an unnecessary tear or whine to speak of and she was visually practicing better self-control, something that will serve her well her entire life.  It made such a difference in our day and I'm so thankful for the feeling of peace that was in our house.  Not a quiet calm because we have two little ones and that just wouldn't make sense, but a happy peace where love abounds. 

I realize at some point tomorrow or the next day a battle will emerge and I'll feel like we're back at square one, but I can reflect on this day and claim the ground we gained again.  She is capable but she needs to be led and I must continue leading her.

The interesting part about it all is when I asked her preschool teacher, Sunday-school teacher, and teachers at bible study if this was an issue and to describe her in one word, they all had the same word......sweet.  When I expressed our issues and what we were working on so a collaborative effort could be made, none of them ever even thought of her as dramatic.  Her preschool teacher said she is the "little mother" of the class, always concerned how everyone is doing and feeling, if they are having a good day or if they need any help.  Her teacher went as far as to say she is the most reliable kid in the class and she can always count on Elyse to help her if she needs something.  Her teacher was being honest, I trusted her in that and I truly believe if there were any issues she would have told me, she said so herself.  I've been reminding myself lately that Elyse is 2.  That's very young.  Expectations should be reasonable so I need to do better with that, but what a wonderful little girl she is showing others.  That made me smile inside and out.  When in other, more social settings, I have a sweet, nurturing, reliable kid.  I knew she was those things, the drama just over-shadowed them and it made my heart smile to be reminded.  With her sensitivity comes her sweet spirit and with her drama comes her passion.  I must tame but I must not break.  I love that kid.