Tired and thankful

I'm exhausted. I stayed up way to late last night for still being a little under the weather, but this fatigue was well worth it.

I was able to spend Friday evening with my sisters, nieces, and dad. We didn't do anything fancy, but that's probably why we had such a good time. I do however know that we stayed up entirely too late for me, but again, it was worth it.

Today the girls from work hosted a wonderful shower for myself and another co-worker...she's due with a boy a little over a month after Elyse's due date. They did an amazing job and again I stared at all those little pink clothes, tiny diapers, and baby creams and I pondered when this will really sink in. I asked myself if I'll really know how to use these things to care for her properly and be able to meet her specific needs. Time will tell. I'm due a month from today and I'm anxious, excited, longing for her to come, but begging for more time all at once.

My mom and I both had to work on Mother's Day, so after the shower my mom, sisters, and I all met up for dinner to have a belated celebration. I love being a daughter, an aunt, and a sister. Elyse is girl #6 in a row on my side and I just think that's amazing. Looking around at all of us women at dinner knowing the legacy of ladies was continuing and growing gave me such a sense of pride to be a part of it all. Maybe becoming a mother myself has begun to cause me to appreciate it that much more and notice how similar our eyes turn when we smile or how our sense of humor is so alike. We are of course very different in many ways, but we share heritage and history and I'm seeing it in a whole new way these days.

The anticipation of a child causes you to think about so many things, yet in a way it's a clueless perspective because it's primarily guess-work. I think I'm really going to be amazed at the things I learn actually having a family and daughter of my own.

I just got home about 30 minutes ago and my eyes are burning as I finish this post. I'm tired but I'm thankful to have so many wonderful reasons to be exhausted.