Can one nap really throw your sleep off by quite a bit? I was early to rise yesterday, did a lot of tiring housework, took a one hour nap at 1pm, and am finding myself unable to sleep right now. We went to bed around 10:30pm and I felt very tired, my eyes were even watering, and yet I just laid there awake for 2 hours.
Maybe it was the nap, maybe it's just the excitement of being 10 days away from our due date. Matt and I sat there in bed watching the motion of Elyse just beneath my skin and her movements just seem so big now. When she stretches out she can almost completely flatten my normally rounded abdomen. I can always tell where her little feet are and she responds to our touch from the outside. She is very active at night and gets extremely squirmy when she has the hiccups. We watched and felt her in utter amazement....we are just so ready to meet her and see the amazing person creating all this internal havoc. In reality, I want both. I want to be able to carry her inside me for a little while longer and just truly enjoy this unique time, but I also want her here to nurture and touch. Knowing she's coming is also scary too....I've never been a mother before. Thankfully I have the perspective God's given me which helps with things like this. He often grants me the insight to truly appreciate and see His hand in so many things that I find myself not wanting to move on, but yet also having the understanding that He's growing me and He has other things in store for me. I want to know what's just around the bend, but I often don't want to release the grip of the incredible moment I'm in because it's often a good, safe one. Sometimes I want to hold on so tight that my knuckles turn white but I know I'm not ever meant to stay in one spot for long. When I reflect back on the last several years of my life and in hind sight see how I have been moved, changed, stretched, and taught, I surrender my shaky situational grip and cling to Him. He knows the plans He has for me, He leads me beside still waters, and He directs my path....I'm so thankful for that. I'm ready for all of this when He says it's time....not a moment sooner.
About Me
- Ursula
- This blog is my hope to somehow capture moments that would have otherwise passed unnoticed, gone by simply dismissed as mundane life. I'm just a girl who adores her husband, I love the job I get paid for and am inspired by the ones I don't. I love that God has designed my life as a perfect fit for me and today I get to live it!
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2 comments:
I couldn't sleep because I remembered your birthday (which I will never in my whole life forget because of the day we drove off in the benz). I just wanted to say you are one of the most beautiful pregnant women I have ever seen and you will be a terrific mother. I've been reading your blog over the past few months and just adore the writing/feelings you share with everyone. I wish you all the happiness in the world and the sleeplessness... well that's just preparing your body for the next 2 months of the lack there of. Congratulations and good luck, your daughter is a lucky little girl to have you.
Thank yo Elizabeth! I remember that day too! I'm glad you found my blog and have checked in on us. I hope all is well with you and Chloe. Maybe we can catch up sometime soon!
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