Food fight

Food has always been a battle with Elyse.  I think the root of the problem started when she was an infant and her weight danced on the edge of being a genuine concern.  I used to mentally count the calories she would consume on a daily basis to ensure she had somehow gotten enough.  She didn't progress to table foods well and ate puree's well past the one year mark.  At the time I loved it.  I could put anything in a puree for her.  I could add calories with olive oil and put spinach in just about anything.  She would eat almost anything in a chunky blend with a spoon, but table food, forget about it.  

She got older, I got lazy, she got pushy, and before I knew it I was a short-order chef to this pint sized person.  I've approached this in different manners as of late but tonight I saw the most progress.  Not in the meal, food or eating, but in the battle itself.  My ability to stay perfectly calm and unwaveringly firm.  I said what I meant and I meant what I said.  

She picked out her dinner, all 3 things that sat on her plate she chose and I was okay with all of them (eating what we eat will be another challenge altogether so I'm attempting this one step at a time).  When it came time to sit and eat, she refused.  I set a timer and informed her that when it beeped it meant dinner was over and if she hadn't eaten she would then go to bed.  She sat at the table and cried, hysterically cried.  She was allotted ample time.  Encouragement was given, the rules repeated.  She never took a single bite, not one.  It was 6:45pm and she was put to bed.

I realized mid-battle that she wasn't upset about the food.  It didn't matter to her if she was hungry or not or what was on her plate.  She was upset because she wasn't in control.  Her goal was to bend me until I broke and when it was clear that wasn't happening she just lost it.  My calmness and consistency drove her crazy when I didn't engage in her battle.  However, her obedience in the midst of her tears amazed me.  She spoke sweetly and did everything I asked without hesitation.  Through wet cheeks and a runny nose, she didn't fight me on anything.  Getting up, bringing her dishes to the kitchen, going potty, brushing teeth or saying goodnight.  She didn't want anyone to be upset.  She just new she'd lost and was accepting of her consequence.  That's where the emotion came from.  Defeat.  To her, it hurt.  It hurt because she realized it was HER choice.  She was feeling the sting of owning a poor decision.  Her will was so strong she chose the bitter taste of pride over a flavorful meal and although she chose it, it was so evident how much it bothered her.  

After all this time, I'm just realizing this isn't about food at all.  How many battles could have been spared had I seen this sooner?      

As I kissed her goodnight and tucked her in she sweetly said to me, "Tomorrow I'm going to eat all my dinner."  She was saying so much more than that in that moment and instantly I knew with confidence that we both gained a better understanding of ourselves and of each other.    

This must be what good lessons feel like.  This truly made me a better parent.  There were no hard feelings toward the other person, just a greater understanding of ourselves and of the relationship.  Calm was maintained and consequences rightfully accepted.  A better grasp on self-control and learning that even a 3 year old must be given guidance on the ugliness of prideful decisions.  

I have a good feeling about dinner tomorrow. 

Pulled Pork

This was AMAZING!  When we've done pulled pork in the past it's often with BBQ sauce.  The past few days I've had a hankering for Cuban pulled pork with black beans and rice.  This definitely cured that hankering and we will definitely make it again.  I love anything I can throw in the crock pot and the meat shredded with minimal effort and was so tender and moist.  I took the picture before I drizzled the sauce.  Matt was a huge fan of the mojito sauce, yummy!

Crockpot Lechon (Pulled Pork) with Cuban Mojito Sauce

Yield: 10 servings

Prep Time: 15 minutes

Cook Time: 8 hours + 5 minutes

Total Time: 8 hours 20 minutes

Tender, fall off the bone, Cuban style pulled pork! Marinade the meat the night before if possible, but if you can't, that's okay too!

Ingredients:

For the Lechon:

5 - 5 1/2 lb pork butt

1 onion, peeled and quartered

6 cloves garlic

1 cup mojo sauce (found in the marinade aisle - I used Publix, but I also recommend Badia brand)

2 limes, juiced

salt & pepper

For the Mojito Sauce:

1/2 onion (about 3/4 cup), minced

6 cloves garlic, minced

2-3 limes, juiced

3/4 cups canola oil

salt & pepper

limes

onion

Directions:

For the Lechon:

Poke holes all over the pork using a small paring knife. Place the pork into a large gallon sized ziplock bag. In a food processor, add the onion and garlic and pulse until minced. Add the mojo sauce, lime juice, and a large pinch of salt and pepper, and process until well combined. Pour mixture over the pork in the ziplock bag. Press air out as best you can, and seal. Marinade for a few hours (preferably the night before, if possible).

Spray the bowl of a large Crockpot with non-stick cooking spray. Place pork butt (fat side up) in the Crockpot, and pour entire contents of the bag over it. Cover with the lid and cook on low for 8 hours (you can let it go longer if you are at work or out and about - this stuff will not dry out!). When ready to eat, carefully pull pork out of the liquid (it will fall apart) and place on a cutting board. Remove extra fatty pieces and shred the pork with 2 forks (it will basically shred itself it's so tender!). Place on a large serving platter and garnish with lime wedges. Serve with additional chopped onions, lime wedges, and mojito sauce (instructions below).

For the Mojito Sauce:

Add minced onion and minced garlic to a heat proof bowl. Heat canola oil in a pan until bubbly hot (put the handle of a wooden spoon in the oil and when it bubbles around it, it's ready!). Carefully pour hot oil over the onions and garlic a little at a time (stirring in between). You should hear it sizzle as it cooks the raw garlic and onions, and it will smell AMAZING!!! Last, squeeze the juice of 2-3 limes and season with a pinch of salt and pepper. Stir well and serve warm over lechon (make sure each person stirs well before spooning it over their lechon - it separates as it sits)!

I did a quick mini-session this weekend for this precious family.  After being sick it was nice to be back behind the lens again and this little guy was so sweet.  He didn't want to smile much but he was a doll regardless.

A birthday to remember......

We did a combo birthday party for Elyse's 3rd and Adley's 1st.  They are 26 months apart so it was technically late for Elyse and early for Adley but logistically speaking it worked.  It's amazing that the first year with Adley is almost over.....the milestone year.  The year that lingers with runny noses and sleepless nights, rolling over and pulling up.  The year with all of the changes.  The minute you get a groove going the baby has morphed and progressed.  It's gone.  I blinked a little too long, a little too often.  Fortunately she won't actually be one for over another month so I have some more time to soak in her first year.

I borrowed almost all of the decorations.  A friend traded cake pops for a photo session and another close friend made their cake for them.  I was very sick in the days leading  up to the party.  I'm amazed it came together the way it did.  We had a little over 50 people at our house but the weather cooperated and despite a bloody lip and split forehead from fun on the trampoline, the party was a success.  We won't be doing one of this size for awhile though.

I was so busy that day, I wasn't able to capture nearly as many moments or pictures as I would have liked but I'll post the bulk of them below.

Happy birthday, girls!

 A pink tutu swim suit is a must for the birthday girl.  It also MUST be twirled in.

 And you little sister and co-birthday girl MUST have one as well.

 Watching them grow....memories and milestones.  This wall was a crowd favorite.  It was so amazing to look at how much they have both changed.  How much they've enriched our lives and each others.

 Cutest cake ever!

 Her expression is so easy to read....."my, my, what do we have here?"

 Are you really just setting it down here like this for me?

 I mean really?

 Well okay!!!!!

 I'll just lift up the entire cake and eat it in one big bite!

 Hands off please.  You had yours already.