Time for some pictures!

I think it's so cute that she sleeps with at least at least one of her (if not both) feet sticking outside of the crib. She won't wear socks and won't cover up with a blanket. I often worry she's cold but I think she's knows better than I do that she's sleeping perfectly the way she is.

Kate Jackson Park. I have tried and tried to get Elyse to do anything in addition to swinging at the park. I've gotten her to crawl through a tunnel and she even humored me by going down a slide one afternoon only to run right back to the swings. It's almost as though she was humoring me saying, "Okay mom, I'll go do this for you but I really just want to swing." She just loves it and would literally do it all day long if there was someone content enough to push her for hours on end.

She loves stairs too. Thankfully we don't have any of those to deal with. Although stairs would probably mean a bigger house, more space, and maybe even a toy room.........maybe I do wish we had stairs. Yeah, I do.

Hyde Park Village pumpkin patch. She wasn't too fond of being stuck in a big pile of pumpkins but thankfully I got a few pictures despite her displeasure.

I read something on balance this week by Joyce Meyer. It has really helped me. I've done a couple of chores here and there each day while setting aside time for me, Elyse, and even some peaceful reading. I got my errand running done, but never frantically all in one day. The downside.....my house is never completely clean and I'm never without something that needs to be done......but it's also never completely messy either and although I didn't have a "free" day, I didn't have a full to the brim one either. The pros outweigh the cons on this one and I'm enjoying this week of balance. Hopefully I can continue with it.

The wives from our small group are attending a truecouponing seminar tonight as our girls night out. My how times have changed.

Elyse went to the pediatrician today for a well check up. At 16 months old she finally weighs 20 pounds! 20# 7oz to be exact and is above the 10th percentile (11%) for the first time in as long as I can remember. She is also in almost the 80th percentile in height. Long and lean......I wouldn't complain if I was her.

The decisions don't seem to go away and I tend to over-research and over-analyze so many of them. She is finally within guidelines to turn around her car seat and face forward which I did as soon as we got back. Then, before her little hiney ever sat in it, I turned it back to rear facing. I do stuff like that a lot. Decide on one thing then change my mind. It annoys me but in the end I'm usually glad that I annoy myself about it.

It's stressful. My hearts desire is to keep her as pure as I possibly can and it's increasingly harder and more challenging. I know I haven't a clue on how hard it will continue to get and that intimidates me even more . Her body, her mind, her spirit....I want to fight for them because everything else in this world is fighting against me. Anything from immoral music and too much television to processed foods and junk sleep. I've found even children's books cannot be blindly accepted. The older she gets the more and more I find myself giving in to certain things or behaviors that I probably shouldn't. It's a daily struggle. Some days I end confidently, but more often than not I end clinging to the promise of tomorrow and the warm truth that I'm not doing this in my own strength.

Friday evening we welcomed a new couple into our small group and began a new study. Both seem to be a wonderful fit and I'm excited to see what happens with these new additions!

Saturday we went to visit with Oma and it really was a great visit. She was in great spirits and although physically she isn't at all what she used to be, on that day, for that lunch time together she was much like she used to be mentally and that was a gift for sure. That evening we went to a community fall festival and Elyse experienced her first bounce house. She was one of the smaller ones in it but she wanted to give it a try. You could tell she didn't trust her toddler legs on the continually bouncing surface so she just say, watched, and got "popped" up and down. When the bouncing would settle she would sign language and say "more" which is the only way I could tell she was enjoying herself because her face was rather expressionless otherwise. She looked cute in there being bounced all around, the only one sitting.

Matt and I went to the Bucs game after church yesterday. We won! It came down to the final moments of the game which is just how I like it, full of intensity. For once we listened to our bodies last night instead of fighting to stay awake and hit the hay at 8:45pm. I feel so wonderful starting out the week so rested!

As usual there is much to do though so I better get to it.

Alarmed

The house alarm shrieked my out of bed a little before 1am on Monday night. Matt was out of town for work and I nearly panicked. In a frenzy I called him as I ran to the key pad. I was shaking, frantically glancing at windows and doors to see if it looked like someone had broken in. My eyes darting, the alarm blaring, thankfully he answered and his voice was calm, soothing and directive. I was so thankful for that. I knew what to do, I knew that we had experienced problems in the past with the system dropping it's cell signal but still I panicked. Even after everything had settled my heart was still racing and my hands were physically shaking. At around 4am I was finally able to doze back off just in time for it all to happen again at 4:30am. This time I wasn't nearly as nervous and although shaken still, I didn't panic. I didn't call him. I silenced it and went back to bed, I'm still not sure I actually ever fell back asleep though.

Needless to say I was exhausted yesterday. I managed to get Elyse's closet organized and made it for a date at the zoo but I was tired. It wasn't until later that I really thought about and appreciated Matt's reaction. He wasn't upset that I called. He wasn't angry that I overreacted. I needed him and he was there, so much so that I didn't even feel the physical distance that was present. He was calm and firm, yet consoling and helpful. It really made me think about my relationship with God. In the turmoil of life, in the moments when my heart is racing and my eyes are darting I need to fix them on Him. He is the calming presence. He is the still, small voice. His word is my instruction and hope. Too often, with shaking hands, I look for quick fixes or a temporary pick me up instead of going to the source of all that is good.

Thankfully the alarm has behaved since and I caught up on my sleep by going to bed early last night and sleeping in a little later today. I don't do tired very well, that's for sure. Speaking of that, I'm going to go relax for a few minutes.

We're home

We got home for The Harbor Beach Resort and Spa in Fort Lauderdale yesterday. We had a great time and although only gone for 3 days I really think Elyse has grown, her hair seems longer, and her vocabulary more broad. I always love her but being away from her for 3 days made me love loving on her today even more. I didn't get quite as much done as I had hoped but the extra time enjoying her was worth it.


I'll post some pictures but they are just about all scenic. I only brought the nicer camera and I just feel weird asking other people to take pictures of us with it because it just seems so bulky and complicated. I am also still learning to use it so I wanted to toy around with it some more. I also wanted to look at pictures of the actual place to help me remember the experience so I can tap into it for years to come. These are in no particular order (I greatly dislike the way I have to upload photos onto blogger. If they could just set it up like Facebook that would be much better).


There was much more to our little trip than what met the lens of my camera. I could not capture what it felt like to sit in a big comfy chair wrapped in a thick terry cloth robe sipping on hot herbal tea or the feeling of sand beneath my toes as we walked aimlessly along the beach together. Waking to my body arising on it's own from slumber to a clock that said 9am and keeping no set schedule or time throughout the day. We did whatever we wanted whenever we wanted and spent much of the time doing nothing. We were spoiled, no doubt about it. We used Matt's points for the stay and gift cards from contests he won through work for dinners out. We viewed this as somewhat of a compensation for Matt's travel. If you had asked me about his travel while I was there I would have said, "Where are you sending him next?". I'm not saying this necessarily makes it all worth it because his travel will always present it's challenges. I've never denied how hard it is for our family but things like this do help and I could tell he was proud to be able to give this to us when otherwise we would not have gone. That in and of itself meant a lot. I'm so thankful for the opportunity and even more thankful that I have a mother who was willing to give of herself and her time to care for Elyse to make this possible.




Just some pretty white roses.

Harbor Beach, Fort Lauderdale Florida

Who wouldn't want to spend the day in that?

The view from our room.

They had a ping pong table near the pool so of course we had to play a game and of course I lost.

We spent quite a bit of time doing nothing in chairs like these.

A scene from our spa day. Matt used more of his points for an 80 minute massage for each of us. He had never had one before (not that I've had very many) and his exact words were....."That might quite possibly be the best thing I've ever done in my life." He was sitting in his bright white spa robe sipping on lemon water and his eyes were glazed over as he said it. He looked so relaxed and I loved that for him. The massage was the favorite part for both of us. Also in the picture there are cucumbers around the tray of cool white towels. I loved sitting around the pool with those on my eyes. I have no idea what they do for you but it made me feel very fancy and it felt good.

They had this flavored water scattered throughout the property. It was such a treat during the day and definitely just different enough from the tap water I normally drink.

Matt thinks greeting cards are a waste of money so I made him one. Luckily I had all of this random stuff to throw together from wedding crafts I did, otherwise I'm not sure it would be any cheaper. The ironic part......he bought me a card. :)

I just like this picture. At first I didn't like that there was some strange man in it but the more I looked at it the more I thought he really added a lot to the photo. I don't think he minds that I left him there.

One shot of the celebratory couple. I set the timer on the camera and just had us jump onto the bed. Hey, at least we got a picture of ourselves. Next time I'll get up the courage to ask someone or just bring the point and shoot.

I wish I had set aside more time to write about this and take the time to let it flow eloquently but I'm in the middle of doing several things and we are leaving tonight for 3 days. I feel like if I don't jot something down now I may not get around to it later.

Hebrews 4:16 (NIV)
"Let us then approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need."

This verse was part of our study this past week and it spoke volumes to me. So often I pray with my head low or hardly paying attention to the things I'm even praying about. I admit my prayers get tired sounding at times. This verse changed that for me this week. Confidence is a big word for me but knowing I can confidently go to the throne, a commentary I read used the words "bold assurance", ignited my prayers.

As I was driving to the study Wednesday morning I couldn't help but think about how good things are for me, how fortunate I feel, and how thankful I truly am. I'm living in peace and enjoying God's rest (which is what we learned about last week). I have learned to recognize that rest even amidst chaos and hustle and bustle. Reflecting on that I began to think that when this happens it usually means the bottom is going to fall out sometime soon. I just felt too good. Isn't it crazy that the thought of feeling so good seems wrong?

When Joann talked this week about approaching the throne, the feet of Jesus, amidst suffering it doesn't necessarily mean our own personal suffering. We are called to share our burdens with each other and when our brothers and sisters in Christ are too weak to go to the throne, it is our job to carry them there with our own faith, with our own confidence and bold assurance. She said that when things are going good for us, perhaps we're being called to take someone else there instead of waiting for our own trials to begin. Wham. She hit the nail on the head for me. While I'm feeling bold, strong, and peaceful, I need to look for someone who needs to be carried and I know I don't have to look far.

Again, I wish I had set aside more time because I know I am not expressing this in a manner that I would normally like.

I'm trying to make, set aside, and label meals for Elyse while my mom is here with her for these 3 days. I'm finishing up laundry and vacuuming floors. I need to pack my bag and change the sheets. There is still much to be done. She had a long weekend off and offered to come stay with Elyse so Matt and I could take some time away together. I just love that about my mom. Her giving side continues to amaze me. We jumped on the opportunity and are declaring it our anniversary weekend. Matt planned a destination (although I doubt we'll go too far) that is still a mystery to me. I'm excited, I really am. I'll just be much more excited once everything is in order, my list is checked off, and we're pulling out of the driveway. We all know just about anything can happen in the mean time.

Elyse says many words now but my new favorite is Amen ("Ahhmen"). She even tried her hardest to say "bible" on our way into bible study this morning. Baby, bible, and bye bye all sound almost identical to each other when she says them, as does football and good girl. Those are just a few of our favorites that I wanted to jot in the blogger memory bank.

We had a busy weekend, in fact, the fatigue still lingers.

Friday....small group.

Saturday.....get together with Matt's family for his cousin, Blake, who is home on leave from Japan for a few weeks. It was so great to have everyone together and hear stories of life on base in another country. We are all very proud of him.

I battled a cold the entire weekend but dosed myself up with Dayquil to make it through. After the family time in Land O' Lakes we made the drive to Lakeland, dropped Elyse off with mom and Tim, and scurried to a wedding of a former co-worker from LRMC. The wedding was reminiscent for me for 2 main reasons. I hadn't seen many of the people in almost a year when I used to see them several times a week. Many of them saw the transition in me from CNA, to nurse-tech, to RN, to wife, to mom. It still amazes me that it's been 8 years since I first met many of them, so of course I had a great time catching up and swapping stories. Conversations with them are never difficult or hard to get started and it's so easy to pick up right where we need to and thanks to Facebook we still have some idea of what we've all been up to.

The other reason it was so reminiscent was because the ceremony and reception were held at the country club I used to be a hostess and cart girl at back in 2001. The banquet room I used to seat people in and pour ice water into polished glasses was the same but almost all of the people were different, and now I was the one being served. I did run into 2 people that I worked with that were still there and we took the opportunity to catch up. It was just one of those evenings that took me right back to years ago but somehow never missing a beat. As Matt and I pulled into the golf course community I half-way expected to wave at the guard on my way in as if I were arriving for work, like she would have somehow known who I was. As we took our seats for the ceremony and I looked at everyone who was there I whispered to Matt, "This is like a family reunion for me, I'm so happy we're here". He has come to know many of them as well and while I blabbed the night away he and some of the other guys kept up with baseball (Go Rays!) and football games so I think we both had a really good time.

Sunday....we made the drive back to Tampa from Lakeland with a tired Elyse and a still sick mommy. Elyse and I took a 3 hour nap which made us both feel much better. That afternoon we went and picked up a push-car for Elyse that I found on Craigslist and she absolutely loves it.

Monday.....A close friend had last minute childcare issues so I watched her 19 month old daughter for the day. I began the day with my head held high but bracing for the worst that I was sure would come. The day was nearly seamless. I honestly could not have imagined it going any better than it did. The girls played so well together and it was just all the more proof that our daughter is a little girl now and any evidence that she was once a sweet, tiny baby is quickly fading away. They are 4 months apart and on almost exactly the same schedule which gave me a nice break while they were both napping.

Today is chores. Nothing pressing, nothing overwhelming, almost so much so that I briefly laid in bed when I first put Elyse down for her nap. I swiftly got out of bed and told myself that not staying on top of things is how I quickly get behind and in turn overwhelmed by tasks left undone.....but now I'm blogging which is still leaving things undone so perhaps I better start doing the undone. :)

Girly girl

Sure I own jewelry. Nothing fancy, nothing expensive. Most of it has been acquired through the years as gifts, deep discount sales, or jewelry parties attended for friends. I like it but I don't have to have it. I enjoy wearing it but I leave more often than not without it. Somehow or another Elyse has decided she likes it. Everything round and circular instantly becomes a bracelet and she twirls it on her wrist for all to see (I really have no idea where she got that from). Last night she found a cheap plastic headband (I've recently started wearing them again to keep my short hair out of my face for chores or at the gym) and she decided it was a necklace. She wore it around for most of the evening and wanted no part in taking it off. More power to you sweetheart, that is definitely jewelry I can afford for you and any man would be happy to provide.

Happy 3 year Anniversary Matt! Has it really only/already been 3 years?!?!

My sliding glass door is open and a cool breeze flows through the air as I fold my laundry. The faint smell of the cinnamon broom still lingers in the air and last night I enjoyed my first cup of hot tea of the season while watching a movie under a blanket with Matt. I love fall. Matt made fun of me because last night enjoying all of this I said, "Fall is love". Looking back that was definitely a nerdy thing to say but then again, I can definitely be nerdy at times. This morning he says to me, "Since fall is love, could you get me a new battery for my garage door opener today." I had to laugh.



After 2 stops and 4 different workers at Lowe's trying to open the opener I did get him a new battery. Fall is love but I would have done that in the summer too.



I've posted a few pictures lately but haven't really mentioned much of what's gone on so I will now. I tried to join a weekly morning women's bible study at our church but when it came time to start they didn't have enough women who needed childcare to cover it so I ended up not being able to do it. I ended up joining one through a different church 3 weeks into a study on the book of Hebrews and so far I'm really enjoying it. The first hour we are all on one big room for teaching/sermon and then we split up into multiple small groups for the second hour. My small group will remain the same throughout the study and I'm thrilled about the make-up of our group. The ages and life stages very all across the board and it reminds me so much of the Titus 2 principle and I'm thankful to be surrounded by these women on a weekly basis. Elyse does okay in the children's area. Since it isn't our church the room, people, and kids are new to her and 2 hours is a long time to her, especially so close to nap and lunch time. I'm confident she will adjust and adapt so that the experience is good for all of us.



I joined 2 friends that I used to work with in Lakeland for a lunch at Maggiano's and some mall shopping, talking, and walking. It was such a great day! Good food, bargains, and company. I formed such close friendships with several of the nurses I worked with and that closeness has been hard to maintain like I would like with time, distance, and circumstances in the way. It's funny how close you can become with someone sitting in a room with no windows and with patients who don't talk for 12 hours at time, trust me, you learn a lot about each other. It truly is unique. One of them is about to become a mom herself so pretty soon she can be my "mom" friend instead of my "work friend". She brought pictures of her little boy on ultrasound and his adorably handsome nursery to lunch last week. The memories came flooding back of when the thing I was most concerned with was finding the perfect curtains for Elyse's nursery. Tiny socks and pajamas were washed and folded, diapers neatly stacked and stuffed animals were neatly in their places. It was such a sweet, special time......I like to call it the dream before reality. There was so much I wanted to tell my friend that day over our plates of pasta. I wanted to find the perfect words to encourage her and prepare her all at the same time but I couldn't. There just aren't words. All I could come up with was, "I would love to be your go to person if you need one. Breastfeeding issues or diaper rashes, call me day or night." Life is life and I know I need a go to person. I hope I can be that for someone should they need it as well.

Oh, gotta go, my lunch date is here :)

We went to a friends daughter's first birthday party on Saturday and my friend was so busy being hostess and taking care of the birthday girl that I told her I would try to snap some pictures for them. My precious subject was so sweet and easy to work with. It was so much fun! I really wish I knew how to work my camera better but here are a few of my favorites for them.
Little miss Maya was dressed perfectly to a tee.


Cake time!

I snuck her out into the grass for a few fun shots.

The little birthday princess was wiped out after all of the excitement.

Vacation birds

A funny little story about this Seabird Sanctuary. Several years back, maybe about 4 or 5 years or so, Matt and I visited with some friends at the condo you see in the background of the picture below, the one with the little white sign with sky blue lettering off to the left of the picture. I don't think we were officially "dating" at the time but either way we were there to visit some friends together.

We all joked about how when we walked outside the condo all you smelled were bird droppings because it was right next to the Seabird Sanctuary. It really wasn't that bad but it was funny none the less. At some point Matt and I had a very deep discussion while walking on the beach that visit. I would even venture to say it was somewhat of a turning or revealing point for us. The details of the conversation are vague but we both remember it being important.

This visit we stayed a few buildings to the right of the Seabird Sanctuary and decided to take a walk with Elyse to show her the birds. We were about to go inside and I paused at the sign to take a picture of them in front of it. Matt leaned over and said to me, "What would you have thought if when we were here all that time ago having that conversation, visiting with friends, and smelling bird poop, I would have said to you.......In just a few more years we'll be bringing out daughter back here." I had almost forgotten about that brief visit and how close we still are with those friends. We all started families around the same time too.

Life is funny like that sometimes. If he would have said that then I would have thought he was crazy but perhaps hoped he was right. Either way, we were there. It was such a sweet little moment we shared and it made me really reflect and think about how much we overcame to be sharing that moment together in the same place all that time later. Too bad it didn't smell better.

I don't know what this little fellow is but I thought he/she was cute.

Eastern Brown Pelican. These are the ones you see everywhere in Florida. The male and female build a nest together and raise their young together, they even share the incubation duties.

American White Pelican. I never even knew these existed until then. I was very impressed with the lengths of their beaks. They are usually found in large groups and share the duties of raising their young together as a group.

The Egret. Interesting fact....Not all young that hatch survive the nestling period. Aggression among nestlings is common and large chicks frequently kill their smaller siblings.

The seagull. Don't eat snacks around them. They are fearless and will snatch it from you. That's all I really know about them.

Those are the birds of our beach vacation......I hope you enjoyed them.