A little bit of an Elyse update.

She is 19 months old and had a well visit last week in which we were told she has the vocabulary of an advanced 2 year old, that made us smile. She is becoming such a sweet and funny little character these days and has finally started snuggling more.

One comically embarrassing thing she does is look at any older man with a beard and loudly say, "Santa....ho, ho, ho!". Thankfully these men havent seemed to notice or they are just keeping quiet about it.

She wants kisses for ouches now which makes her seem so much older than I think she is. Her independence, though challenging, is a joy to witness but her ability to surrender and politely ask for help warms my heart. She still knows she needs us, I enjoy that.

She is piecing together concepts and expects follow through on promises. We were in the car the other day and I told her we were going to the store and then the park. We had to pass the park to get to the particular store, one we don't frequent, and she was beside herself thinking I had forgotten the park altogether. I didn't realize until then how careful and intentional I need to be about following through and making sure my yes means yes and my no means no. It's amazing how much a child can begin to fine tune your character, I like that too.

It's late. I could go on and on about this precious little person but I need to rest to meet her in the morning. I would also like to add a picture but I dont know how to do that from my iPhone yet. I will soon though.

Calm My Anxious Heart

"Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.  And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.  Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things."  (Philippians 4:6-8)

This verse was our focus during my women's bible study this past week, which started back again 3 weeks ago.  It's a commonly referenced verse, but one I hadn't truly dissected or meditated on before now.

It tells me what to be anxious about, what to do with those anxieties, tells me what I am promised if I do that, and what to think about instead of those anxieties.  It's truly freeing for me. 

The study we're doing is called Calm My Anxious Heart by Linda Dillow and if "anxious heart" describes anyone, it's me.  Two chapters into this study and the things being revealed are giving me feelings of confidence and changing and renewing my mind.  I hope I am never the same after this.

One of the things my women's small group has talked about is the saying, "if mamma ain't happy, ain't nobody happy", but how the opposite can be true to.  As a woman, as a wife, as a mother I have been given the power to exude a spirit of peace in my home.  My very thoughts and responses to circumstances have ripple effects on those surrounding me and this is something I should take very seriously.

I prayed this over our meal, over Elyse when putting her to bed and in my quiet time.  I want this verse to become so much a part of my thinking that there is no room to have any other response. 

On another note, we battled another high fever with Elyse this weekend but thankfully it was rather uneventful and lasted less than 24 hours. 

From what I understand my car is repaired and we should be able to get it back this weekend.  Turns out some sort of exhaust thing or another (obviously I have no real clue) just needed to be cleaned out which didn't end up costing us anything.  For that, I am very thankful. 

My mom texted me last weekend and said she had a 4 day weekend off from work, that she would love to have Elyse come over for a couple of days. Of course I said yes. I mean, I couldn't deprive my mom of time with her granddaughter after all.

So I dropped her off late this morning and made the hour drive back. I didn't know what to do with myself. The floors needed to be cleaned and the dishwasher needed to be emptied, but instead I took a nap. I woke up, ate a late lunch in front of the TV, took a hot bath and finally redeemed a massage gift certificate from last Christmas.

Now I'm sitting in a massage chair getting a pedicure and tonight I'll go to dinner with Matt. I have not so fun appointments like the dentist and touring a preschool tomorrow, but I'm just going to enjoy today. This moment right now.

My first post from my "smarter than me" iPhone. I think I like using a regular computer better because I still can't type very fast on this.

I'm awake and hoping to go to sleep soon but Elyse is having intermittent crying fits. Because this is unlike her I did go in and rock, cuddle and pray with her. She seems to be settling as I type.

My car isn't working. I went without any car period for about 2 days but thankfully one of those days it was pouring down rain so it was the perfect excuse to stay in comfy clothes and enjoy being home. Elyse and I both slept in and both napped that day, it was great.

Now we are borrowing my father in law's truck while mine gets assessed and hopefully repaired. It's been a great vehicle. I got it right out of college, used on eBay. It turned 11 this year and hit the 160k mile mark this month. I've also never had to put more than $150 of repairs into it so it has definitely served us well. Matt and I both feel so fortunate to have a repair shop in the family so we know we're taken care of right. It gives us such peace of mind.

This phone is acting funny now so I'm going to go.

I'm hosting Bunco tomorrow, wish me luck ;)

Emptying the vacuum

If there's one thing I can't stand to do, it's empty the vacuum. I don't know what it is about it, but I just don't like doing it. I will let my vacuum get so full that it actually doesn't even work as well because there's so much dirt in it. I'll let it fill and fill from cleaning while and then one day when Matt's home I'll ever so casually mention that it needs to be emptied and hope that he does it for me.  Once it's emptied I'm often surprised at the power behind it and how well it cleans because I'd gotten so used to trying to use it while it was beyond full. Of course the deep thinker, over-analyzer in me wondered why that was and if there was a lesson for me behind it and low and behold, I think there is.

I'm also like a vacuum. I have a job and a purpose and if I allow myself to get full of grime, dust, dirt that's visible and dirt that isn't, I don't function as well or perform my duties to the best of my ability or to the height of my calling. Like pushing a full vacuum, when I'm stuffed past the "empty now" line with gunk, I lose sight of my potential or the way I once functioned prior to adding the baggage.  I don't operate right, or certainly not as good as I should. 

Because of this difficult thing known as pride, the hardest part for me is often admitting that there's so much junk there.  Even with the vacuum, I just keep using it, avoiding the hassle of cleansing it's insides and detangling it's brushes. 

My brushes get tangled with the dead hairs and stray strings of things I could have done a better job with.  I don't strive for perfection but many times I simply knew it wasn't my best and I do want to continually strive for that.  My canister gets filled to the brim of burdens that just need to be placed at the feet of Jesus. 

How can I achieve this?  Pure repentance and casting my cares.

There are times I pray that I long to pour my heart out to God, but for whatever reason I feel like I can't.

Hebrews 4:15-16 (bible study last semester focused on Hebrews and this verse spoke volumes to me)

For we do not have a High Priest who cannot sympathize with our weaknesses, but was in all points tempted as we are, yet without sin. Let us therefore come boldly to the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy and find grace to help in time of need.

I can do that because in I Peter 5:7, "Casting all your care upon Him, for He cares for you." God gives me permission to come boldly, without hesitation, to cast my cares on Him.  I can do that and enjoy the release of knowing that He cares, really cares, and that He can do something about it.  Jesus Christ, our High Priest, is a feeling person, and He can feel my pain and my infirmities. He was tempted like I am, and He knows what all of this is like.   I can tell Him my hurts and pains, disappointments, things I struggle with, the things I'm tempted by. I need to stop hesitating and thinking, "I can't possibly tell God that."  After all, He knows anyway. 

Ezekiel 18:31-32

Rid yourselves of all the offenses you have committed, and get a new heart and a new spirit. Why will you die, O house of Israel? For I take no pleasure in the death of anyone, declares the Sovereign LORD. Repent and live!
......in other words, empty my vacuum.

Luke 5:31-32

Jesus answered them, "It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick. I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners to repentance."
......in other words, empty my vacuum.

Matthew 3:8

Produce fruit in keeping with repentance.
......in other words, empty my vacuum. 

The vacuum in me feels better already.

Weight watchers crock pot chicken and dumplings

This recipe is cheap and not too bad as far as calories go.  I'm sure there are many, many supremely better chicken and dumpling recipes out there, but I've made this a few times and we like it.  If you know another one that's good and easy, please send it to me. 

Chicken & Dumplings


4 Boneless, Skinless Chicken Breast
1 can Fat Free Cream of Chicken Soup
6 biscuits (Pillsbury Golden Homestyle Buttermilk canned biscuits -2pt per biscuit)
2 cups of water
1 Tablespoon bouillon, any flavor

Cut the chicken into bite sized pieces. Add all of the ingredients except for the biscuits and cook on low for 5-6 hours. Add salt, pepper and any other seasonings that you would like. In the last 30 minutes of cooking, turn your crock-pot on high and tear biscuits into 1 inch pieces and add to slow cooker.

I also add frozen peas to this to make it a one dish meal.  It's perfect for this cold weather we're having again. 

It's cold and raining so the weather is rather icky today, so are Elyse and I.  With neither of us feeling well, the thought of filling the remainder of our day once she gets up from her nap intimidates me.  I suppose I'll deal with that when the time comes.  

Yesterday Matt and I went to an antiques show where we waited about an hour and a half in line to have some of his grandmother's things appraised.  I had never been to anything like that and it was interesting to see many of the things there.  It turned out what we have isn't worth a ton, but definitely worth something so in an effort to de-clutter we'll have to decide what to do with it all. 

I got an iPhone this weekend.  It's neat.  It's the older one but for someone like me just getting into smart phones I think it will be good for what I need.  I've never had internet or fancy apps or any of the other bells and whistles this phone has but I'm excited about it.

Matt baked some chicken fingers last night and we have enough left over for dinner tonight.  Since I'm not feeling well I'm trying to think of something to do with them for dinner but so far I haven't come up with anything. 

My sick baby is up, wheezing and coughing.  I better go :(

I made money on these items today.  The past couple of weeks I was rather discouraged with couponing.  The sale ads just didn't add up with things we would actually use or that we needed.  This week was great!  Not only were they free, but  yes, I made a little bit of money toward my other groceries in overage.  My final bill.....spend $50 and saved $58.  Happy coupon dance time! 

Yes, I agree that I need to get a life. 

During the church service on Sunday I reached into my pocket and happened to find a quarter.  I jokingly but excitedly showed it to Matt (I really do get excited about little things like that) and because I was childishly excited, as if he were my parent, he suggested I put it into the offering. 

My mind wandered back to the felt lined sterling offering plate that passed in front of me as a child.  I would put my very small amount I was giving into the envelope because it was fun to lick and seal and made me feel like a grown-up.  The blank boxes to check before me were things I didn't really understand......tithes, offering, church planting, missions, or other.  I didn't know what I was giving or where it was supposed to go but I always thought our simple, small, modest church would look prettier if it had more flowers.  I figured more people would come if we had flowers outside and if more people came that would mean more people would go to heaven and I liked that thought.  So each time I placed my money in the envelope I would check the "church planting" box in hopes to eventually see those flowers that would surely save the world. 

I don't think they ever did get those flowers, and later I did decide to leave those Mormon beliefs behind, but I assure you it wasn't because of the lack of flowers.

It got me thinking though.  Things like tithes and offerings may be clearer to me now, but I struggle with where to give my time.  There are many boxes on the envelope of opportunities to give time and talents but many aren't conducive to bringing an 18 month old along.  I've felt, for lack of better words, a disconnect about this.  I want to be involved with something, somehow, somewhere but with Elyse being so young and Matt's work and travel schedule it makes it challenging.....or am I just not trying hard enough.  Is this just a season in my life that is primarily for my young family, or is there something more out there that I should be doing?    

Good thing I know just where to look and exactly who to ask.

A friend from college was here from San Fransisco visiting family and she and her boyfriend came and spent the day with Elyse and I last week.  We started out at Cracker Barrel (because they don't have one back home), caught up during nap time at the house, then went to eat at Frenchy's on Clearwater beach because her boyfriend had never seen a Florida beach.  We were just catching the beginning of sunset before we had to head to the airport for them to catch their flight. 

New Year's eve we went to a friends house for dinner, we were home by 9:00pm and in bed by 11:30pm.  Such a wild and crazy life we lead and even though we didn't see the ball drop, 2011 still was there to greet us in the morning. 
I wish I had before and after pictures of our closets and rooms in our house.  Matt had a 4 day weekend and we used it to the fullest to be productive.  We purged just about every room we could, organized closets and even managed to make a little sense out of our huge shoe pile in the garage. 

I never considered myself much of a pack-rat but then I found these......

......the first flowers Matt ever gave me.  It was sweet to see them and I took the picture to save the memory but when it came down to it, they didn't make the cut to be kept.

I'm hoping to tackle kitchen cabinets this week and then I think we will have done the entire house.  I've always felt like I kept a relatively surface clean home but if you opened a closet or cabinet it was nothing but chaos.  I'm hoping I'll be able to maintain the organization because it really does feel nice.