First family photo session

March 6, 2010: Although sunny, it was windy and in the 50's over near Madeira Beach. We would keep Elyse wrapped snug in a warm blanket then whip it off to snap shots. Baby, weather, new photographer.....I think things turned out wonderful all things considered! Here are the pictures in no particular order.

I'll make it a combo please

Our small group has helped each other kick it into high gear to encourage and hold each other accountable with our recent studies. Although important, we had become very social and we knew we needed to get back on track and I truly feel we're doing that. This past weeks studies were entitled "Life Beyond Regret" and I had no idea it would speak to me like it did. As you can probably guess it's been about confession and forgiveness which isn't a new topic for me but it just spoke to me differently this time. I have faithfully read Psalm 51 each day and I continue to be impressed with what I'm being shown. I haven't been very confident in knowing how to "meditate" on a particular scripture or even what that really means but I truly feel like I'm learning what that looks like for me and why it is so important.

Another member of our group visited a friends church and shared this with us: "Pastor Q, as he calls himself, talked about the Lent season and how it’s a great time to “remove and replace” things in your life that are distracting so God can fill the space. We were given a calendar of daily and often simple things to follow that will help us do just that."

This is the calendar:
February 28 – Read Psalm 62:5. Be confident that your hope should only rest in Christ, hope for all things in life…do you really believe that?
March 1 – Fast from your favorite treat or hobby.
March 2 – Have a conversation with a family member in which you share about one of the most difficult times in your life.
March 3 – Spend at least thirty minutes with someone under the age of 5 or over the age of 70.
March 4 – Fast from coffee, soda, or alcohol.
March 5 – Slow down today and do everything very deliberately. Drive slowly, walk slowly, talk slowly, and eat slowly.
March 6 – Read Matthew chapter 5 and do something you enjoy doing.
March 7 – Pray the Lord’s prayer today at 9 am, 12 pm, 3 pm, 6 pm, and 9 pm.
March 8 – Watch the 6 o’clock news today as a family and then pray together about what you saw.
March 9 – Pray before and after meals today.
March 10 - Fast from technology: TV, computer, internet, video games, and music.
March 11 - Make a meal together as a family and then eat and talk about your day.
March 12 – Choose one person and pray for them three times today.
March 13 - Read 1 Corinthians 13 and practice what you have just read.
March 14 – Find out about something your neighbor needs and make it happen.
March 15 – Go for a walk in your neighborhood and pray for everyone you see.
March 16 - Send a handwritten letter to a relative who could use some encouragement.
March 17 – Fast from the radio or music while in the car.
March 18 – Have a conversation today with someone you wouldn’t normally talk to.
March 19 – Cook a meal for someone and take it to them.
March 20 – Read Philippians 2:1-1.1 Reflect on the text and apply it to your life.
March 21 – Make it a point today to say positive things to people all day long.
March 22 – Put a list of things for which you’re grateful in your pocket. Take it out and read it three times throughout the day.
March 23- Have a conversation with or do something thoughtful for a neighbor or classmate.
March 24 – Tell stories as a family tonight by having each person share something that made them laugh this week.
March 25 – Give up online social networking for a day [Facebook, Twitter, etc.].
March 26 – Invite someone over for a meal.
March 27 – Talk to or call someone you love and tell them what you love about them.
March 28 – Place random Post-it notes with encouraging messages around the house for your family to find.
March 29 – Buy someone’s coffee or lunch anonymously.
March 30 – Eat only one meal today of rice and beans. During the other two meal times, pray for the hungry of the world.
March 31 - Read Luke 23 and reflect on what Christ did for us all.
April 1 – Don’t eat out today and give what you would normally spend anonymously to someone you know who needs it.
April 2 – Go to a Good Friday service with your family or a group of people. Spend 10 minutes in silence remembering Jesus’ death.
April 3 – Spend the evening with people you love.

Although I haven't followed this perfectly, I must say I have greatly enjoyed the challenges it brings and God is certainly using it to reveal things to me. I'm loving it. Which leads me to the title of my post......I like the combo of the two. I like the reading and study of one specific topic which has lead me beyond just the "assigned" reading and has spoken to my heart but I also really like the daily challenges and assignments that stretch my comfort zone and force me to move out of habits and complacency. I would love to find a way to keep this combo going.....forever.

Apparently she just needed a little encouragement...

....to really get moving. It's amazing how much this kid loves her snuggie and I should have thought of involving him in her crawling efforts sooner. She would prefer snuggie to Matt or I any day of the week and it definitely shows in this little video of what I consider to be crawling. Ignore the mattress.....I was washing our sheets and I set her on there to play because I've noticed she is much more brave when her surroundings are soft.


Who knows, maybe she'll take her first steps on the padded comforts of a mattress. Apparently my little girl just likes a safety net. I love that about her already. I'm so excited for her!

Still no teeth and according to her doctor she isn't anywhere close to getting any so we are just soaking in every little toothless grin we get. We have her whole life to look at her teeth so we are very thankful for the extended time we have with just her "gummy bear" smiles.

Love this weather

I just realized I had 2 posts that still hadn't been posted so in a matter of a few minutes I'll have 3 new blog entries and as I looked back over them I'm realizing I was struggling to have something to write about which is unusual for me. Anyway, I'll just write about right now.

Today is beautiful. I would even venture to use the word perfect. These are the Florida March's I remember and love. The sidewalks and playgrounds are littered with families having so much fun and all of the wonderful sounds that go along with that. We took Elyse to the park and laid a blanket out on the crisp bright green grass and tried our best to soak in the day. There was a slight breeze and the air was a little cool but the sun was so bright that the slight warmth it's radiant rays kissed our skin with made it all feel so perfect. Kids kicking soccer balls, boys playing flag football, babies in swings, toddlers racing down slides all surrounded by that sweet little giggle that kids make. I love just sitting and watching that. Elyse was content to pluck blades of grass and Matt loves watching her so we all enjoyed it in our own way. It was the nicest hour I'd had all week, it even beat my scalp massage at the salon and not much tops that.

Yesterday we had our first family photo session and I am so excited to get the pictures back and post them. It was actually FUN. We didn't want to spend too much money so we went with a very new photographer that we met through one of my best friends, Kristin. We were actually her first paying clients so we got a great deal and we are very pleased with what we have seen. I have a family. That thought still takes my breath away.

Refreshed

I feel refreshed. The weather is a little better, although still not warm, than it has been. The sun is out and the air is crisp. Elyse is on the tail end of her cold but I went ahead and took her to the doctor just to be sure things were okay before the weekend rolled around. It's funny how all my medical training in NICU and pediatrics goes right out the window when it's my own child. A fever? What do you do about that? How high is too high? When do you call, when do you medicate? If it were someone else's child in the "comforts" of my hospital surroundings I would have had all the answers but at home alone with my own whimpering child I was concerned and clueless. After the doctor examined her and all seemed to be on the mend I felt silly for having gone but she offered so much encouragement and assured me that I did the right thing. I know I've said it before but I like reassurance and encouragement. I question my competency as a mother without it. Now that I think about it I don't know of anyone that doesn't like to be told they're doing a good job. I probably need to say that more.

My mom came and spent the night last night. She watched Elyse while I had a little pampering at the salon then we watched a chick-flick in our pajamas and ordered take-out....it was as good as it sounds. It was nice to have the company since Matt was out of town so I definitely appreciated it. I feel like I'm finding myself saying it yet again, his hours have been long and hard and have kept him from home. It's hard. It's lonely. It is what it is. I go through this so often in my mind.....I wish he could be home more, I wish he didn't have to work so late, I wish, I wish, I wish. Then I quickly remind myself it is the exact reason I get to stay home and I'm so thankful for that. I want to have my cake and eat it too. Balance. I'm still trying to find a way to balance things better in so many areas. I guess as life changes things shift and you have to reassess how you balance. Have I been reassessing too long? Definitely something for me to ponder.

Elyse is a little "behind" for her age....at least I think anyway. She is a little over 8 months old and doesn't crawl, scoot or go from being down to sitting up on her own. She can go from sitting up to getting down but not the reverse. She loves to stand but can't do much once she's up there and can't get there on her own. Other babies her age are doing much, much more and I am normally not one to compare because I realize different kids reach different milestones at different times and it will be this way her entire childhood. However, lately I've noticed what one of the culprits may be. When she's standing and she is about to fall but catches herself or if she thinks there is a possibility she may fall she gets upset and panics. She doesn't even fall but the thought of it is just so scary to her and she flails her little arms. A few times when she has fallen and landed softly onto her diapered little behind she gets upset as well. She isn't hurt and she probably got to where she wanted to be anyway, yet this still upsets her. I find all of this a little odd because I see other babies so fearlessly taking on the world attaining bumps, scratches and bruises without so much as flinching as they ruthlessly explore their surroundings. Elyse seems to be a bit of a fraidy cat and she is definitely shy and timid in her exploring.

I didn't think I would see so much personality in her so young. I was one of those who just figured "babies are babies, how different can they be". Was I ever wrong. Matt and I were both very shy as kids so maybe a portion of it can be attributed to genetics. Either way there is just something so sweet and innocent about it but at the same time a little worrisome for me. She's small for her age, quiet and doesn't even flinch when things are snatched from her grasp by other kids, she just calmly looks for something else. Being just like this as a child I got "walked on" a bit and I don't want that for her. As I was thinking about this I realized I was flailing my arms over something that hadn't even happened yet. She isn't being picked on. She is a happy little girl. I had buck teeth, glasses, was shy and had a "weird" name. As much as being picked on for those things shaped me, I somehow want to spare her from that and I know I can't. I just hope I'll have the wisdom to teach her how to handle those situations as they arise. For right now I'll just remind myself not to worry ahead or panic when I haven't even fallen, and who knows, whatever I find on the ground just might be worth it.

Need I say more?

Elyse is not feeling well. The wetness on her shirt are a combination of drool, tears and snot. I should have snapped the picture before I wiped her nose but oh well.

I've never taken care of a sick baby like this before. A rough night gave way to a rough day and I'm hoping, but doubtful, that the worst is over. I feel so bad for the poor girl. She is clingy and whimpering quite a bit but don't let the clingy part confuse you, she still doesn't cuddle. Maybe some day.

I've been lazy today. Shame on me lazy. I've used the excuse that I don't what to get too involved in a task because of how needy Elyse is so the laundry is still sitting in baskets. Other than that things around here aren't all that bad so I decided the clothes could wait. Hopefully I'll feel more productive and she will be better before long.

I guess that's really the only updating I have to do. Our weekend was uneventful with small group on Friday which I actually sort of led for the first time, Saturday I used Space Bags (which I'm a big fan of now) for my hospital scrubs and Elyse's clothes that no longer fit. My entire career of scrubs filled one large bag and Elyse's newborn to 3/6 month clothes filled two.....something about that definitely doesn't make sense. That night my friend Rachel came over with a friend and we spent the evening with them which was a special treat because I don't see her as often as I would like to anymore.

As usual Monday has found us again and I'm thankful we don't have any pressing plans this week so Elyse can lay low while she gets better. Normally I like to have a well balanced week of busyness but if she had to get sick, I'm thankful her cold came to visit with a low pressure, limited expectation week ahead. I'll let you know how it all goes.